Confessions of Jessibelle

The truth hurts. I'm sorry. There's no holding back this time.
If you know me in real life, consider yourself warned.

Friday, February 27, 2009

I remember those big goofy welfare glasses you used to wear. Now that you've had Lasik, I'm almost kinda sad I won't get to see them anymore. :P

I remember you walking me to class one day while we were in jr high, you reached down and grabbed my hand, and the principal started bitching about no PDA, you grabbed my hand even tighter and said "I'll hold your hand if I want to." It's sweet that you still want to.

I remember when my confidence was shot and I was convinced "I can't". You were the one that told me I could. I did and I have. Thank you for that.

I remember in high school, in between classes while we were all loitering in the hall, you asked if I had any candy or mints. I told you that I just put my last one in my mouth and held it in my teeth, you leaned over and took it with your teeth. Damn, my boyfriend was pissed. So was your girlfriend. And we wondered why no one ever believed us when we said we were just friends.

Every boy I've ever dated, I tried to find someone that made me feel the way I do when I'm with you... someone to make my heart pound the way it did when you grabbed my hand in the hallway at school... someone to tell me when I'm being ridiculous by just saying my name in the way that only you can... someone to make my knees weak when they grab my face in their hands and kiss me... someone just like you.

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

kryptonite

I thought I was okay. I can be a bitch on the phone, I can be a bitch to you online, I can even talk shit about you and mean it. Then you show up on my doorstep. I can't be mean to the face that I still love. You see straight through me and give me a hug. You drove 8 hours just to say hello. I hate you, I love you, I miss you. You can't keep doing this to me. I can't keep letting you do this to me. The next time you decide to drive across 3 states to see me, it needs to be forever, or it needs to be goodbye.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

you

damn it, why do I love you? Why can't I make it stop? I don't know how many times I've daydreamed of coming home from work and seeing your truck in the parking lot once again... how it would feel to be in your arms again... what I would say