St. Louis

I know weddings are supposed to be happy occasions but, the one Q and I went to last weekend just made me depressed. I've never had the typical wedding day, fairy princess fantasies. I never cared about the flowers, the dress, the cathedral, or even prince charming. The one thing I'd always wanted at my wedding was to be able to dance with my grandfathers at the reception. They're both gone now. I don't know if it's the depression or what, but I just can't see myself getting married and having my own family. I don't see the point anymore. The only person I could ever see myself with happily ever after broke my heart. The person I've been dating for the last 10 months I don't even know why I'm with.